i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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