You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
