Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
