you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
He better not be in your backpack
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
