SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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