I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
my nose is crying tears of wow.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
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