Dual....:-)
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
