I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
