So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
