Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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