i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Randomize
