I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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