I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
