There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
