I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
