do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Cover your peen. We're going out.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
