I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
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Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
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You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
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