Your mouth is God's brothel.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
