so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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