I am puke
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
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