we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Randomize
