Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
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