4 words: hood of his car
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I just gargled with NyQuil
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
