This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Just pee around me
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
