Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
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When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
So much Jack, so little girl.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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