Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize