would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Randomize
