I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Randomize
