You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Randomize
