Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
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