the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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