There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
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