Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
