She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
