I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
