I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Please don't give away my fajitas
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize