yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize
