Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
My dad is sitting where you rode me
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
