Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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