why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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