Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
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