we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
