How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
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