I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I love you. Go after that dick
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
