I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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