JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I wish there were birth control emojis
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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