Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(206): View more from Washington

Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.

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(206): Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too. http://tfl.nu/q39q

Replies (9) Good night (1626) Bad night (599)
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(818): View more from California

she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick

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(818): she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick http://tfl.nu/e1f8

Replies (12) Good night (940) Bad night (4208)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.

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(860): Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years. http://tfl.nu/9khg

Replies (78) Good night (6835) Bad night (914)
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(515): View more from Iowa

once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.

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(515): once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window. http://tfl.nu/ziko

Replies (8) Good night (3545) Bad night (698)
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(601): View more from Mississippi

There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.

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(601): There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis. http://tfl.nu/xpx8

Replies (9) Good night (1709) Bad night (4812)
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(520): View more from Arizona

The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.

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(520): The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears. http://tfl.nu/pc9j

Replies (11) Good night (2732) Bad night (894)
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(480): View more from Arizona

He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed

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(480): He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed http://tfl.nu/idar

Replies (6) Good night (814) Bad night (2649)
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(714): View more from California

Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww

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(714): Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww http://tfl.nu/e98y

Replies (13) Good night (3901) Bad night (1342)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...

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(919): I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend... http://tfl.nu/oued

Replies (10) Good night (4444) Bad night (1073)
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(940): View more from Texas

Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers

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(940): Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers http://tfl.nu/bomc

Replies (14) Good night (4153) Bad night (947)
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(+61): View more from Australia

For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays

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(+61): For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays http://tfl.nu/y95k

Replies (3) Good night (1024) Bad night (515)
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

This is love.

(860): View more from Connecticut

Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?

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(413): This is love. (860): Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party? http://tfl.nu/8lic

Replies (3) Good night (1473) Bad night (545)
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(434): View more from Virginia

Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.

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(434): Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it. http://tfl.nu/a357

Replies (1) Good night (602) Bad night (415)
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(619): View more from California

Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.

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(619): Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman. http://tfl.nu/nljs

Replies (5) Good night (350) Bad night (731)
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(719): View more from Colorado

My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.

(505): View more from New Mexico

By piano you mean.....

(719): View more from Colorado

Like literally a piano.

(505): View more from New Mexico

Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.

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(719): My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked. (505): By piano you mean..... (719): Like literally a piano. (505): Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing. http://tfl.nu/b7lv

Replies (5) Good night (905) Bad night (342)

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