spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing