Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(440): View more from Ohio

I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(440): I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman http://tfl.nu/jmt9

Replies (6) Good night (2331) Bad night (1467)
Favorite
(404): View more from Georgia

Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(404): Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them? http://tfl.nu/hlb3

Replies (38) Good night (845) Bad night (7176)
Favorite
(513): View more from Ohio

I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.

(440): View more from Ohio

...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.

(513): View more from Ohio

That was a text you sent me last night.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(513): I think I'd do Clint Eastwood. (440): ...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now. (513): That was a text you sent me last night. http://tfl.nu/tvw9

Replies (36) Good night (10152) Bad night (1184)
Favorite
(513): View more from Ohio

After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(513): After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God. http://tfl.nu/onhi

Replies (16) Good night (3273) Bad night (1614)
Favorite
(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(814): I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer. http://tfl.nu/a96i

Replies (33) Good night (1196) Bad night (3446)
Favorite
(405): View more from Oklahoma

I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(405): I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth.. http://tfl.nu/0ol0

Replies (19) Good night (5450) Bad night (1834)
Favorite
(780): View more from Alberta, CA

He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(780): He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again. http://tfl.nu/j7t8

Replies (19) Good night (4743) Bad night (1716)
Favorite
(512): View more from Texas

Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(512): Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits? http://tfl.nu/6yhs

Replies (84) Good night (1599) Bad night (11145)
Favorite
(409): View more from Texas

Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(409): Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager. http://tfl.nu/h00w

Replies (8) Good night (4860) Bad night (1600)
Favorite
(570): View more from Pennsylvania

He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(570): He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander. http://tfl.nu/mcls

Replies (5) Good night (1475) Bad night (831)
Favorite
(712): View more from Iowa

I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(712): I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love http://tfl.nu/bjop

Replies (23) Good night (4690) Bad night (883)
Favorite
(919): View more from North Carolina

I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(919): I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water http://tfl.nu/62v1

Replies (2) Good night (557) Bad night (1723)
Favorite
(714): View more from California

I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(714): I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :) http://tfl.nu/j4k1

Replies (3) Good night (820) Bad night (306)
Favorite
(563): View more from Iowa

I almost tased myself

(1-563): View more from Iowa

I dont think you should own that device.

(563): View more from Iowa

It's an awesome device. I love this device.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(563): I almost tased myself (1-563): I dont think you should own that device. (563): It's an awesome device. I love this device. http://tfl.nu/0r8c

Replies (1) Good night (704) Bad night (398)
Favorite
(306): View more from Saskatchewan

it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.

(306): View more from Saskatchewan

oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(306): it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator. (306): oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it http://tfl.nu/nakp

Replies (6) Good night (594) Bad night (294)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard