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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night

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• (619): View more from California

  The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.

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  27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (314): View more from Missouri

  You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  When / where did the additional couches appear?

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Additional?

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.

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• (718): View more from New York

  I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud

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  23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (989): View more from Michigan

  I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday

  (513): View more from Ohio

  FREEDOM

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  I'm not well. Although it could be worse.

  (248): View more from Michigan

  My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.

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