It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
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