we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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