Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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